I'm tempted to have lunch with a charming, but awful man

Stella has been chatting online to a wealthy man who hasn't mentioned sex once - he wants to meet but could they possibly be a match?

For months now I've had an intermittent dating site conversation with a Spanish man called Tony. He is a wealthy business owner who can't believe how difficult it is to find a wife. He's awful - that's almost certainly the reason - but hilariously awful. I've been the woman he has moaned a lot and occasionally said outrageous things about women he'd met, and I slapped him down, and he enjoyed my outrage.

Last week, suddenly, he got in touch asking to meet. I've decided you're the only person I really like on the site, he wrote, I think we should have lunch. I said I didn't think so. I thought we'd disappoint one another in reality. Oh come on, he said, it's just lunch, for God's sake. Don't take everything in life so seriously. Still, I dithered. Give me your number, he said, so we can speak to one another. I gave him my mobile number and he rang. Unfortunately, he was incredibly good company on the phone, in that way that so few people are, and he had a sexy accent. Dammit, I thought, I'm temped to have lunch with this awful man who says outrageous things about women; this won't do at all.

The next evening he rang again. "I've been thinking about you today," he said. "I like your deep voice - do you smoke?"

"I don't," I said. "Do you?"

"Of course," he said, "though I'm down from 40 a day to 30."

"I couldn't kiss a smoker," I told him.

"Don't be ridiculous," he said. "I do use toothpaste."

"I'm not kidding," I told him, "there's probably no point having lunch." The following evening he rang again and kept me talking for over an hour. I was beginning to think I ought to have lunch with him. He was undeniably charming and he seemed to think I was a catch^[각주:1], which was an unusual enough situation to warrant consideration^[각주:2]. And he hadn't referred to my body once, or mentioned sex once, or hinted there might be Skype nudity in the near future. It was refreshing just to be courted^[각주:3] a bit. 

There are hypnotists^[각주:4] for ending smoking addiction, and perhaps Tony's openly judgmental streak^[각주:5] was really just a kind of social coping^[각주:6], a way of getting a rise out of people. Maybe he had a tendency to e a wind-up merchant and might drop it once I knew him better.

When Tony rang the following night, I agreed to lunch. He named a place and a day and a time and I agreed. I told him I'd heard a good joke that day and told him, but he didn't really get it, which wasn't a great sign. He said he had one for me, and then the terrible thing happened : he told me a racist joke. I couldn't believe my ears. "I don't want to have lunch with you," I said.

"What," he said. "Why?" He knew why. The joke had been a test.

"Don't ring me again," I told him."Don't contact me again." I felt guilty^[각주:7] about finding his previous awfulness funny.

I went to the coffee shop looking for Andrew, wanting to talk to someone I like. He was there, reading an article about George Osborne, and we blundered^[각주:8] straight into ^[각주:9]a huge argument about austerity^[각주:10]. Andrew thinks we need to slash the welfare budget further. How did I not know this fundamental thing about him? How can we get to know people, new people, in middle age, without issuing a 1,000 question questionnaire?

I went home and rang Bill, and told him what Tony had said and what Andrew and I had argued about. Bill was horrified, which was reassuring^[각주:11]. "I think you and I should meet half way," I told him.

"I have news," he said. "I've started seeing someone."

Disheartened^[각주:12], I got in touch with a man called Kieran. He messaged me back in the spring, while I was besotted^[각주:13] by Peter. He was still on the site, and seemed winningly^[각주:14] normal in every way. I wrote apologizing for turning down^[각주:15] the offer of dinner during the Peter debacle^[각주:16]. I told him I was sure at the time that I'd found someone, though the road had turned into a cul-de-sac. Kieran replied saying, in effet, that I'd had my chance. If I didn't recognize his value then, I wasn't going to clue^[각주:17] him now, and so no, he didn't want coffee.

1. 먹잇감 정도로 이해했는데, 사전에 catch가 명사로 구식 표현이지만 [결혼 상대, 직원 등으로 탐나는 인물] 이라는 뜻이 있다네요 [본문으로]
2. 심사 숙고가 필요한 상황이란거죠 warrant가 동사로 require 정도의 의미를 가지고 있네요 [본문으로]
3. 살짝 [마음이 갔었다, 끌렸다]는 표현을 be courted 라는 표현을 썼네요 [본문으로]
4. 최면술사입니다. psychic이랑은 별개로 해서 쓰는 단어인듯하네요 [본문으로]
5. [바탕을 이루는 부분과 색깔이 다른 기다란 줄 모양의 것]이라는 뜻 외에도 [사람의 성격에서 특히 좋지 못한 구석]이라는 뜻이 있네요. 동사로 쓰이면 [줄같이 기다란 자국, 흔적을 내다, 줄무늬를 넣다] 라는 뜻이네요. 줄과 연관된 기본 이미지를 가진 단어 인듯하네요 strand라는 단어가 떠오르네요 [본문으로]
6. 사회적인 대응, 대처. 글속의 남성의 행동을 나쁘지만 사회성이 있다는 식으로 좋은 쪽으로 생각할 여지가 있다는 뉘앙스네요 [본문으로]
7. guilty가 형용사형인지라 "죄책감을 느꼈다" 라 할때는 명사형인 guilt말고 guilty를 사용하네요. [본문으로]
8. mistake이라는 단어대신에 이 단어를 구사할 수 있을지 모르겠네요 [본문으로]
9. [곧바로] 그렇게 되었다는 의미로 straight into 라는 표현을 쓰네요 [본문으로]
10. [긴축]에 관한 이야기를 하는 걸보니 경제적인 상황이나, 정치이야기 하다가 다툼이 생겼나보네요 [본문으로]
11. Bill은 자기 의견에 공감해주어서 [안심이 되었다] 는 의미이네요. 내심 또 싸우게 될까 걱정하면서 전화는 했었군요 [본문으로]
12. disappointed보다는 좀 더 크게 깊게 실망한 뉘앙스입니다. heart가 들어간 단어라 그런지 무게감이 있어보이네요 [본문으로]
13. besot는 능동으로 쓰면 [누군가를 혼란하게 하다] 이니 수동태인걸 보면 화자가 혼란 스러웠다는 것이죠 [본문으로]
14. win이 들어 있어서 승리와 관게가 있을줄 알았는데 정작 뜻은 ]애교있게]라 되어있네요. 한국사람들은 잘 못알아 듣겠어요. [본문으로]
15. [약속을 취소하다] 라는 의미로 turn down을 사용했네요 [본문으로]
16. 악센트를 "디"에 줘도 되고 "버"에 줘도 된다네요. [대실패, 큰 낭패] 라는 뜻이네요. Peter라는 인물 자체를 하나의 낭패라고 재미있게 표현하네요 [본문으로]
17. clue를 동사로 쓰니 [단서를 제공하다] 라는 의미로 쓰이네요 [본문으로]